I cannot tell you how devastating it is for young people to not have a dad.  I’m not talking about someone who fathered a child, I am talking about a man who is closely involved in the lives of his children.  I am talking about a man who will sacrifice his own life for the benefit of his kids; who will love them through thick and thin, who will provide for them, protect them, love them enough to properly discipline them, and someone who will be there for them . . . always. Maybe you’re not a dad.  (If you’re one of the wonderful gals out there, pray for us guys and then make sure several men have a chance to read this blog.) Maybe you’re a grandfather, uncle, brother or friend.  Families may look a bit different from each other now days, but all kids need a “father.”

Here’s a sad thing:

”more and more kids are growing up with dads who are “absent”
. . . either physically or emotionally”

In other words, fathers are just not there for their kids.  Absent fathers are not teaching, guiding, supporting, playing with, encouraging, making a way for success, challenging, instilling values, or teaching the Word to their children.  There’s an epidemic of kids growing up in isolation without Godly male leadership in their lives.
Men: It’s up to us!

Maybe you didn’t have such a great example in your life.  Maybe you were wounded by a father figure.  It’s not too late guys.  You can learn to be a terrific father.  You can be the difference between life and death for your kids . . . really.  It has been shown over and over that kids who have dads who are actively engaged in their lives will be less likely to abuse drugs, alcohol, participate in pre-marital sex, or participate in other risky behaviors.

Let me give you some ideas:

1.  Make sure your own life is in order:
• ask God for the wisdom to be a godly, servant-hearted leader.
• you might have to “suck it up” and ask some Christian brothers to help you out.

2.  Love their mom:
• your love and support for your wife will be the best thing that will cause your kids to grow up safe, secure, and learn about healthy, wholesome relationships.
• and it will provide a loving, safe, healthy, home-life.

3.  Be a leader:
• you be the one to study God’s Word and then make sure the Bible is read and the Lord is worshipped in your home.
• you be the one to see that everyone gets to church meetings.
• you speak words of life – never bitter or sarcastic.
• you ask for forgiveness – admit it and say you’re sorry.
• you be kind and generous.
• you be servant-hearted – using your gifts to serve others.
• you be the good neighbor – demonstrating respect for others.
• you show your kids what’s right – don’t just say it – do it.

4.  Be active in your kid’s lives:
• read them a story and pray with them when you put them to bed.
• meet their teacher and see how you can help with their education – while placing more importance on their character than their grades.
• provide them with opportunities to encounter God like making sure they get to every youth meeting, camp, missions trip that you can afford and arrange.
• tell them you love them . . . every day.
• listen to them . . . every day: listen to what they did, what’s bothering them, what they’re anticipating and hoping for.
• be there when they need you – not constantly so busy or consumed with “doing your own thing” that you’re never around.

5.  Protect your kids:
• it’s a real trick to watch over your children and keep them from feeling like you’re “hovering” or not letting them grow up – but you can.
• monitor their TV, computer, texting and social-interaction.
• teach them to guard their “eye-gates” and “ear-gates” – watching out what they see and hear.
• go to their school (if necessary) and make sure the powers that be know about unhealthy situations, bullies, or simply bad teachers.
• watch out who their friends are – remind your kids that you’ll do “whatever it takes” to keep them safe – even if you have to “move to Nebraska” to get away from unhealthy opposite sex relationships or trouble from evil people.
• as much as possible, make sure that wise and responsible leaders (like at youth group) are around your teens – you never know when the important questions of life will come and you don’t want some snot-nosed, pimply-faced kid teaching your daughter about sex or “the meaning of life.”

6.  How about this one?
• Go to the Men’s Advance next week!
• “Armed & Dangerous II” will be a tremendous benefit to you in your ongoing journey to become the best dad, grandfather, brother, or manly leader that God has called you to be.

You can do it!

Love you all,
Steve